Tuesday, 7 May 2013

About Love

When I was young, I stuck a sticker on my mother's dresser that says "I Love You".  That was on valentine's day and my dad thought it was tacky.  He did not want to hug mom or kiss her in front of the kids.  
The sticker was peeled off 6 years ago when I was going through my court separation process.
Yes, I thought, love is really a marketing gimmick for those who think they're in love, got married and later found themselves stuck with a partner they don't even know, let alone really love.

As I raised a child alone, I realised that love could only possibly exists between a parent and a child.  Blood ties are stronger than anything else.  
That's when I know the reason why some men will never marry a woman who has been married before, the same reason why some men can never love another man's child.

This made me question, if some men are so adamant about having their own child, then why some made children, then ran away from their responsibilities?  Or use their work as an excuse to be an absent father?  Or only want the sweetness of raising children but not the gruesome truth about waking up at night and making a bottle?
Then those men who are adamant about having their own children, from their own bloodline, they are:
- very selfish (stubborn is already a trait in them)
- afraid of the responsibility (then how would I ever trust this type of men with their own blood line?)
- having no compassion (won't make a good father even to his own blood line)
- lacking love themselves (there aren't enough love to distribute to existing human, i.e. the child from the other man, so why would there be enough love to give to his own blood line?)

After much soul journey, I finally decided these:
- some love are very much 3 dimensional.  The type of men that are so adamant about having their own blood line continuing are simply the ones that have not awakened to the fact that we all came from the ultimate source of love.  
These men are too wrapped up in the things that can only be seen with the naked eye.  His job, his business, his friends, those will come first because hey, even the love that you talk to him about, cannot be seen, until it is proven once you conceive his child and slave over him.
- the kind of love that you want to have and be, is the one that connects at the soul. Hence the word "soul mate" that has its usage abused for as long as language existed.
This love, is so rare that sometimes, it does not exists in one's current lifetime.  Depending on what you've signed up for before you come to earth, your soul mate (s) can decide whether to contribute to your lessons (say, if the lesson is of acceptance, then he'll probably bring in a set of his own kids instead of just you bringing in yours) or whether to just be a companion (supportive parents/friends).  If you are going to face a tough life, then your soul mate can decide to be your devoted life partner to get you through that lifetime.  
I can go on with the permutation of cases where soul mates are meeting in one lifetime, but the point being is that despite what the masses think on what love is, it has nothing to do with marriage or physical aspects of it.  
In fact, much of it has to do with one's relationship with one's higher self.  That aspect of us, has direct connection to the ultimate Source of love, therefore, we need not be afraid that there's not enough love to go around to other people's children.  As long as we connect ourselves to the Source, we're going to be LOVE ourselves.  
How do we do that?  To love and to feel loved?  We raise our vibration by accessing higher state of consciousness.  It is so much easier to do that now since people are awakening.  People realise that some partnership has to break to make way for higher learning.  

I know some will stay adamant to their 3 dimensional living because their fear of the unknown is greater than their willingness (or ability) to change for that matter.  For a small step of changing one's perception is a big step in raising one's frequency.

Love and light......


  1. Thanks for your sharing.

    Firstly, I am a man. I am now married but I am struggled whether I should maintain the marriage. There have been conflict between us in the past one year.

    We have a four year old boy. I think if we finally separate, I will still live close with them and take up my responsibility by caring of him, studying with him, etc. may be it is too optimistic as I admit that I really do not have the experience and wisdom to handle this problem.

    1. Thank you for reading my single life ramblings.

      Every posts I wrote is certainly intended for both men and women. I do know there are probably many more women who are much 3 dimensional than there are men.

      Conflicts are inevitable, not only in a marriage, but in all kinds of relationships. Notwithstanding your religious belief or traditional belief, I seriously feel that whether or not you remain in your marriage is entirely up to you. So, you yourself have known the answer to this already, even without going through the conflicts in the first place.

      As for the technicalities of raising the child after the separation, it's going to be subjected entirely to the two families. Although, never discount how the child really feels about it. He will be able to tell you who he really wants to be with and you will have to listen and respect his decision. He is after all, is human with feelings, too.

      Listen to your inner voice.