Knit and Crochet Fair 2013

Last Sunday, despite her opposition defiance virus (I say yes, she says no, I say no,  she says yes, etc), we trot along to the "Festival Rajut Bandung 2013" (Bandung Knitting Fair 2013).

Getting there was an art in itself.  Thinking the highway would be a wise choice (less traffic since we have to pay to get on it), 5 minutes into the 'highway', we were stuck already.

Slowing down....

Getting slower...

Stuck....

Really really stuck!

 The "Under the Sea" display at "Festival Rajut Bandung 2013".

The competition, theme: Aquarium.  Of course no aquarium is complete without a Barbie doll.

Stuck again on the way home!

The haul.  Deliberate angle, I have a grey mohair mountain at the back.

Things to note:

- people don't sleep in on Sunday morning here....

- they're found on the highway...

- I'm going to be quite busy listening to lectures in the next few months...

- while knitting/crocheting....

Curtain Call

2013's Super Moon

Life is a stage where actors and actresses take different roles each time.
The script is already written but they have freedom to follow or improvise.

Question is: Who are the audience if we are the ones on the stage?

"Man of Steel (3D)" Review

Watching a movie in a fully packed theater, everyone wearing 3D glasses and you coming in late with burgers, coffee and popcorn to share with your group, is certainly a unique experience in itself.

Book all the seats on your row and fill it in with your male friends.  The more the better, the younger the better.  The youngest I went with last night was two 10 year old boys and I suspected they are having the most fun out of the group.  The oldest was early 40's male and I strongly believe he enjoyed it as much and was thankful for the capuccino.

It's a pity I missed the first 5 minutes of it, thanks to the snack bar people who decided to upload pictures of our orders on their social networking pages while they were preparing it.  Yes, they were caught snapping pictures of my orders!  Ok, 13 popcorns, 10 burgers, 2 hotdogs, 10 coffees, come on, that's normal for a girl like me isn't it?  Work is stressful.

Thankfully we were just in time to catch the conflict between alive Jor El and Zod.  The first hour consists of a lot of flashbacks and at one point it got quite exhaustive.  The moment the beard was gone and the suit was on, that's where the jam packed action started and superman seriously got hotter.  With the beard he just looks more like Wolverine minus the Edward scissorhands apparatus.

That's Clark Kent before the cape.  Wolverine's brother perhaps in another franchise?

Ah, this picture is so smooth I would've slipped off that chin.

Be prepared to get shaken from the loud noises that comes from the surround sound in the second hour.  I tell you, I felt every POW and BAM that was happening on screen.  In fact, I feel a bit hung over today morning.  The second half of the movie was literally just hard core fighting and I really wondered how many people will get hurt if that actually happens in real life.  I prefer peace talks than jungle rule.

The ending was interesting however, (spoiler beware) Superman we once knew, never kills, but Kal El, just choose to snap off the neck instead of rescuing the family in danger.  Hmm.  Choices choices perhaps.  Easier to eradicate from root. Aye well chosen, the world is changing afterall.
Then, Kal El trashing the satelite drone because the government has been snooping on his communication line?  That reminds me of a certain PRISM and Snowden's confession.  Ooohh, the veil between Holywood and real life just became thinner and thinner.

Overall, I would say, see it for the action and technologies.  Don't expect anything new, we know the story for the longest time, maybe there are lights shed on certain issues, but nothing new.

Oh!  No more red undies display, that's new :)

Disclaimer:  I do not own any of the pictures above.

The Awakened Mind Part 3

When you learn to let go the shadow of your past, that's when you can move forward with your life experiences.

Here is the final part.  You can check part 1 and part 2 if you you missed out.

"To end this looong message, I’d like to finish with some notes I took while listening to Kryon that really spoke to me.  Maybe it will speak to you too.

  1.   Let go of fear!! You can’t un-know what you find out.  Go inside and pick up the knowledge of thousands lifetimes!! (I love this!!  I’m constantly doubting in myself, I ask myself if I’ll forget this one day or not and it really helps that someone reassures me that no, I won’t.)

  2.   Let go of fear of Gaia!  (Some people are afraid of being in the wrong place, in the wrong time, earthquakes, tsunami etc.  If you listen to your intuition, you’ll be at the right place at the right time.  Just don’t neglect your inner voice (that’s my other name for intuition).

  3.   Don’t think like a human!! (That’s the best of all. Humans are taught to fear, to always be scared, to analyze things in details.  Well, it turns out that it is a lot better to let yourself be guided by your intuition and have joy in your heart!!  Always...) Humans also like to project themselves in the future constantly... well guess what: There is no time!! You’re in the now and you stay with it!  (easier said than done though.. but listening to some Eckhart Tolle can help us with this)

  4.   Shine your light for yourself!!  Once you find something that works share it.  (Yay, I’m so proud of myself right now.  First time I’m sharing something that works, well at least with a group of people.  I’ve always done that in one to one conversations.)

Bring the light.  Show that to other people.  When you discover it, let it shine through you!!  Work on yourself.  Get out of drama and worry!

  5.   Expect good things in your life!!  Our consciousness is the most creating tool in the world. Expect to live longer and you will.  Expect happiness and you will be happy.  (Don’t expect from other people though... it’s all about the self, the only person we can ever change is ourself.)

  6.   Fall in love with yourself!!!  (Ah, that is a good one.  If only it was that easy.  When we fall in love with ourselves we treat ourselves like we treat the people we’re in love with, with love, we take care of them, we wish the best for them... lots of things to think of about this.)

  7.    Ask!  Always aks for whatever you want!!  (We don’t have to do it all by ourself.  Our guides are there for us.  And we are here for each other.  After all we are all one!!!)

This is the message I get over and over again, my first thought almost every morning, when I open my eyes and see the reflection of the leaves dancing on the sunlight surrounded by the sweet air...  We are all one!!  Nature, animals, people... We are all one... and I love you all!!!"

There's nothing to join here.  There's no club to enter.  There's no belief system to embrace.  
I simply connected with the me who remember and I'm connected to all....

The Awakened Mind Part 2

If you have read about chakras, you'll know that on our palms, there are minor chakras that can be used for energy works.  Light workers use their hands a lot to be a channel of the source's energy.  Believe it or not, we are equipped to heal ourselves if we know how to tap into the source's energy.  The fact that I'm allergic to so many things including pain killers had taught me to listen to my own body and try myriads of unconventional healing methods, instead of reaching out for the various brands of medicine.

Enjoy part 2...

"The problem is that like most people, I want it all and I want it now.  I often ask myself, if I know what I want, why can’t I have it now?  If thoughts are matter and we create our own reality through our thoughts, words and actions, why doesn’t it always manifests itself? And by “it” I mean the reality that I create, the one I think about.

Luckily for me (and unluckily for my impatient ego) I’ve found answers to these questions.  Of course I’m happy to share what I’ve found out with you.  You see, first of all it’s really important that you trust in yourself.  This is not one of the ending lines from the movies or the end of a tale that our parents used to tell us before we went to sleep.  It is indeed true, and they’ve been telling us this over and over again, it’s just that I don’t see that many parents put it into practice and unfortunately/fortunately (there are always at least two sides of seeing things) we tend to learn more from what we see than what we hear, more from experience than theoretical learning. But that’s another story.

So, to be back to our initial story, we can always have what we choose, because our thoughts are energy, energy creates matter and we can attract whatever we want or we don’t want, but unconsciously think about. (Have you ever wondered why you found yourself in the same situations over and over again?  Because we unconsciously attract the same patterns over and over again, because we haven’t let go of fear and because we found ourselves in a familiar situation we know how to treat.  When we say we don’t want something, we usually have it, because we focus our energy on the non-wanting part, so we attract what we fear the most.. haha tricky) But we can let ourselves out of it, if we think consciously. It’s not easy to do, but it can be done.  One of the things that might work is to monitor your thoughts and always think of the highest good.  Think positive is not just a slogan. 

The reasons why what we choose don’t appear immediately can be resumed as below.

1. because we don’t know what we want => ask yourself the questions, what is that you want

2. because we keep on changing our minds => choose the same thing over and over again

3. because we think it is too good to be true

4. because we can’t decide what’s best for us

5. because we want to have guarantees ahead of time that this is the right choice

So we should really take time to ask ourselves what we want and ask for it with our whole heart and then let it go.  One way or another it will come to us.  And I’m talking particularly about women since most of us (or well the feminine side of us) wants to have guarantees so ahead of time that we don’t fully concentrate on the present moment.  We can’t decide what’s best for us right now.. and I’m one of the worst, but getting better with time.

Another thing that I wanted to share with you is my healing experiences on myself. I’ve done tonglen on other people too, but I can’t say I’ve cured them, but myself yes, I have done that.  I think it’s my connection mind-body-spirit that plays a big role in that.  I always ask my body what it wants, from simple things such as eating (and it doesn’t always reply Ice-cream), veggies and fruits are good too, but sometimes pizza is good too… everything is good as long as it makes me feel good.  By asking I almost stopped drinking at all.  My body never requires alcohol.  “It makes me sad”, it tells me.  “Ok, as you like” I reply.  I also ask my body if it feels like exercising.  Yesterday it told me, let’s do some yoga. I do kundalini yoga, and I’m stuck in the second chakra.  But yesterday I said, “Ok, if that’s what you want, why don’t we start by the first one, we both know we’ll enjoy and then do to the second one.”  

I ended up doing 30 minutes of the 1^st chakra and one hour of the third one.  I hadn’t plan starting it but it was really really great.  I finished at midnight and slept like a baby.  

To please my mind, I read; that’s my mind’s favorite past time. Now I’ve started to ask my guide about the book I should read.  In the past, I used to read a lot and always finish the book I had started.  Now, I don’t mind that much letting things seemingly unfinished.  When I start reading a book I know I will always find the answers I’m looking for.  Sometimes the book has finished its purpose before coming to an end... and I should let it go.  I wish that with time I start following the same practice on other things and ultimately people, letting go when they’re no longer good for me.  It’s like wasting my time with a book that will no longer bring me what I need, when there are plenty of other books out there which can.  And of course every day I take care that my soul is happy… music, nature and meditation, that’s what my soul wants.  It’s not that hard having balance after you’ve found what works for you.  And in that way I can find health too... but I must be careful of self-sabotaging.

I’ll explain. Once your body-mind-spirit are in balance the risk of being sick is really low.. unless… you have been wanting to be sick for a long time (not directly, but for example, you’ve been so sad depressed you have unconsciously or consciously wished not to live in this planet any longer during a long period of time) or if you haven’t listened to your body requirements it would be a way of your body telling you to slow down or to tell you you’re not paying attention.  (That’s what happened to me two weeks ago.  I had totally forgotten I had anemia and one day my body refused to get out of my bed and made me realize how much I was tiring my body by not taking any kind of medication... iron or anything else.  So I just stayed there, on my bed, listening to my heart beating a lot faster than normal to fill my body and brain with the required amount of blood.  I realized how stupid I had been, I said I was sorry to my heart and I went to see a doctor.).  And third sometimes you wish to be sick to take some time for yourself...a day off, and that’s totally ok, too.  BUT, if you don’t like being sick and you get a bacteria in a subway that make you have fever and cough... and you don’t like that, well, you can make yourself better just with meditation.  I should know, I did that 3 times on myself and it worked overnight, all times.  And it’s just 3 times, because in 3 years I’ve only been sick that much and it lasted only a day.  Usually what I do is picture my disease with a different color (for example, my tonsils with red light and then I imagine every white cell in my body getting bigger and bigger, they surround the red light until it dissipates and I use my fingertips to let it out of myself.  Before I surround myself with a white light and I ask my guide to be present.  I imagine him on top of my head... but not always... actually none of this is necessary, it’s just what works best for you.  I adapted Michael Newton’s meditation in the end of Destiny of Souls and I use my hands in the end to touch the place where it hurts.  I can feel a warm energy coming from them and then I go to sleep with the intention of being healed when I wake up in the morning.  My mind/body/soul does the rest.  There was a time when I was pretty sick with high fever and I woke up every two hours during the night and repeated the meditation.  My body temperature dropped constantly, 1 degree every 30 minutes until I was healed. It was great!!!

Of course I’m not telling you to believe me, I’m saying Try it for yourself!!!  There is nothing more powerful than you and you can do miracles.  

You are creating your own destiny and that in itself is already a miracle.  Maybe this won’t work for you...but it works for me, everyone is different, but if you carefully listen to yourself and follow your intuition you can do and choose whatever you want... choices are limitless.  You are doing it now, anyway, the questions is, are you doing it consciously?  I am not doing it consciously all the time either, but well at least I’m trying. ;)"

Did you enjoy part 2?  If you missed part 1, read it here.

The Awakened Mind Part 1

A good friend of ours wrote an insightful entry a few weeks back.  Many of us are going through the same thing that she does without being aware.
She is in her twenties but yet her thoughts are beyond age restriction.  Who says maturity comes with age?  When they say age is just a number, it really is just what it is, numbering system to mark your three dimensional existence on earth.
Enjoy....

"I don’t exactly know what I am going to write in this page, my purpose is to share what I know so far. I never thought writing what I know or what I think I do, just because I believe that every person has their own truths that come at their own time, but today I changed my mind, for two reasons. First, I woke up this morning finding a sweet message from a dear friend  who told me for the nth time to follow my intuition and share what I know. Second, another dear friend of mine asked my personal “feeling” about a matter because I have a strong connection with myself. So the reasons I’m writing this, besides sharing, is to hopefully make you realize that we all can share a strong bond with ourselves, even though we believe that we don’t sometimes and maybe to inspire someone. I feel I owe this to every person that has inspired me with their stories.  Nothing of these things I’m about to say is new, but from my little personal experience that I have, I know that sometimes we just need a little push, or confirmation to believe. I’m not writing here to convince anyone either. This is my truth so far, and I’m willingly to change it, if someday, another truth will appear in front of me that is contradictory to this one. But for now, this feels true to me, so as I often say, what feels true to you it is indeed true. I would be a terrible liar if I didn’t apply that to myself in the first place.  

I’d like to start with a story, taken from the book “The Knight with the Rusty Armor”.  For those people who are not familiar with the story (a big spoiler here): there was this knight who was so used to fighting dragons and saving princesses with his sword and armor that he didn't bother taking his armor at all of him. Of course that didn't please his wife who asked him to choose between her and their son and his armor. He chose them or course, but the moment he tried to take the armor off him, he couldn't  He had been using it for so long that the armor became him.  (hehe, does this speaks to you? It speaks to me a great deal ;)) 
He tried to force it out of him, but he couldn’t. So finally he decided to go and see Merlin to help him. Merlin told him that to get rid of the armor he should follow the path of truth and go in and out 3 castles: The castle of Silence, The castle of Knowledge and The castle of Will and Dare. He didn’t need to take the sword with him because there wouldn’t be any dragons and he could use the help of a pigeon and a squirrel. (..tough work making the knight believe he could talk to animals, but well not an impossible thing to do either). 
In the first castle the knight had to go alone. He felt betrayed, but he had no choice. He discovered he was afraid to be alone, and he cried himself a lot of times to sleep but when he got used to it he started to hear a little voice inside him that called himself (Sam… why not?) and told the knight that he was him. When he started to listen to Sam, his little voice inside him, he found his way out of the castle. He found out that all the tears he cried during the time that he was in this castle, had removed part of his armor. He felt lighter and began once more to climb the path of truth until he found himself outside the castle of Knowledge. 
This time squirrel and pigeon went with him inside the castle. In the castle of Knowledge the more they were the better it was, he didn’t have to do it alone. He called Merlin for help too. Indeed all these castles had no doors. The door appeared when the truth was found. But this castle had no lights either. Just an inscription that said 'Knowledge is the light by which you shall find your way' … guess what happened next? Well I won’t tell you, you have to find out yourself.
The truth is that I’m in this castle myself, but I guess you guessed that in the castle of Will and Dare he found nothing more or less than his greatest fears.  So, he had to confront that dragon without his sword and got burned more than once... ouch... familiar story isn’t it?  But the knight did find his way through the castle, and that was it.  He got rid of the armor.  The Beginning.  (not, The End. How great is that?)

When I read that, I was happy to discover that personally I was out of the Castle of Silence (Yaaayyy!!) and I was inside the Castle of Knowledge. I had identified my problem, discerning need from love   and I learned I didn’t have to do it alone anymore. 

I was so happy!!! The question I was asking myself when I started to read this book, was: “Now that I know what my problem is (one of them at least) that I am an emotionally dependent person, how long will it take until I get rid of it? Until I become independent from anyone, until I learn to love unconditionally, to let go completely, not get attached to the outcome or to anyone and go with the flow? “ 

When I asked this question I didn’t realize that another quest was out there for me... patience. The first step is made, but the cure can take years. It took me 2 years to go in and come out the castle of Silence, and I just got in the castle of Knowledge and maybe it will take me 2 other years there, or maybe 10 or maybe this life will end before I can get out, but I tell myself that it’s ok. At least I’ll die trying and why I’m there, maybe I can do the castle of Will and Dare as well… Uhh that sounds like it’s not possible, because as long as I don’t let go of the outcome I’ll always be afraid of losing something... so I’ll go with one step at a time...."

To be continued in The Awakened Mind Part 2....

The Harvest

Mandrake look alike.  Snap off the leaves as soon as you finish taking pictures.

The weird and wonderful world of organic carrots.  Do not cramp these babies in one area that they turn out  very very special.  We had a sponge Bob version in the first haul. 

Although they are very tasty without any embellishment,  the inner cook in me wanted more.  Roasted with olive oil, sprinkle of rosemary and thyme with some salt and pepper.

Waiting for the Longest Time

Sunday morning, glorious sunshine and happy hearts.  The song to sing today was somewhat very appropriate for this situation: various Acapella versions of Billy Joel's "For the Longest Time", the original, the Overtones' & the latest Glee's.  

Question is: "When to pick these babies??"

Surprise Gift!

As if one can predict one's own predicament, hence beware of what you say, I was swamped with work on my birthday.  

When you get to my age, after the siblings and your child singing happy birthday on We Wish You A Merry Christmas tune, the next ones to be wishing you birthday are: your suppliers (so you continue to work for them), your insurance company (may I live long and not claim my insurance prematurely), and the ones usually being real nice and attentive are the bankers (so forever will you invest with them).  These are truly sinful indulgence from those lovely boy bankers.  I need a diet plan STAT!

"Epic" Review

"Epic" 

Yesterday was dark and gloomy, the supposedly dry season took a sudden turn into what looked like a start of the monsoon season.  That old rule of months ending with "ber" like September, October, November, and December are cold, windy, rainy months still hold true.  But now we get those "ber" months in non "ber" months.  Sunny and hot one day and cold and rainy the next.

After an epic fail of showing nicely in front of my old relatives (who showed up unexpectedly, we're talking about people who live in another country and out of town, coming in unnoticed and they think that's just awesome, NOT), especially when I was so busy, I might've missed out combing my hair (ok, not might've but actually did not).

On to the review!  The little girl started bothering me about seeing "Epic" since she saw online that it premiered on 24th May.  So, that was 4 days of nagging and screaming about "Epic".  I used that opportunity to teach her about going with the flow and letting go of obsession on outcome.  I would say that it's the hardest lesson to learn and not surprised that many adults aren't able to do that still.

Set during the day at the time of the summer solstice which coincide with the once in 100 years' lunar eclipse at the night of the full moon, immediately throws the audience for a magical ride.
Despite the deja-vous that I had from certain scenes, like oh, that's like "Honey, I Shrunk the Kids", or hmm, that feels like "Alice in Wonderland", I must say that when you watch animation in 3D, there are so many things to focus on that it just takes your breath away and this movie is exactly that, the backdrop were the lush forest somewhere out there and with it, were all the weird and wonderful creatures that inhibit the magical place.  Queen Tara for example was so much Barbie like that I wonder, is that really how Beyonce would look like, animated?

Queen Tara choosing the pod.

The messages that has been coming through to our little audiences are these:

- "just because you haven't seen something, it doesn't mean it's not there", Bomba the Stomper (Jason Sudeikis)

- "many leaves, one tree, we're all connected", Ronin the Leafmen (Colin Farrell)

- "I'm going to destroy the forest, I'm sick of balance, the forest belong to the darkness, you can't stop the rot", Mandrake (Christoph Waltz)

- "you're here for a reason, sometimes the connection aren't clear", Queen Tara (Beyonce)

- "if our world dies, your world will die, too", Nod (Josh Hutcherson)

Now, in light to the recent Public Disclosure on UFO, I feel that our children are being prepared for something huge.  As seen in the "Croods" before as well, the same messages prevail.  It may be another decade until we actually being shown anything solid, to do with colonies living in another dimension, vibrating at a higher frequency than us, but these animators are laying the brickwork for our kids so they won't be surprised.  We are so waiting for that day to come, but remember, only those ones who believe will experience the magic first. 

Disclaimer: I do not own the pictures above.

Doodly DooHooo

The 'corner people' is emerging.  I wonder if this is going to develop to cartoon flips.

The 'right' and 'wrong' (as oppose to left) club.

Closet Competition.  Aim: highest number of costume.

This made her little cousin's eyes wide with wonder.

The bonus was added later on when the competition ended.

New members for the fruit club?

This is what happens when you tell her to do Math.

The 'little people' has emerged.

Seriously Salivating!

Living with Autism

The disappearance of children with Autism (like Mikaela Lynch)and the subsequent discovery of their bodies near a body of water, often makes me wonder about why they are attracted by the water.  
Is it the shimmering reflection of the sun rays on the water that makes it irresistible for them to touch it?  Not knowing the depth or what may lie on the shallowness, jagged rocks, slippery surfaces, endless possibilities of situation that can turn the simple curiousness of these little children into a deadly incident.

Like most mothers, I introduced water as early as 6 months old, to get her to play with the feeling of weightlessness when in a pool.  Often gave her baths and showed her that water is harmless when we know how to swim.  As she grew and knew Science and Maths, I explained to her how the knowledge can help her decide if she can walk or float in the pool.

However, no matter how good I am in the water, splashing in all kinds of styles, when she goes in, she clings to me.  There are times when she takes courage and holds the floater, flipping her feet, trying to remember when to take breath, but co-ordination was never her forte.

One warm sunny day on a vacation, we lounged at the pool and took a fun swim with the single bed floater and pushed her around the pool.  The temperature was lukewarm, the water was cool, sunset was soon and it was very calm.  Some teenagers were being silly and started to join us at the pool.  We decided to just soak up the sun on the giant crescent shape bed-swings sporadically situated at the pool sides.

As I drifted to an afternoon snooze with her on my side, she slipped off the bed-swing and told me quietly that she wants to see the big dolphin floater on the pool side.  I immediately became alert and sat up to finish the bottled water while watching her approached the pool at the corner of my eye.

She walked without looking back, confident that she didn't fancy to swim some more, I stayed on the swing, drinking away my water.  The next thing I saw just as I finished my last drop of water was her hand above the water splashing, obviously gasping for air and unable to touch the pool ground.  I took off my robe, ran as fast as I possibly could, disregarding my cellulite and everything else that can possibly jiggle as I leaped into the water to grab her.  I hugged her, told her to cough out the water, to stay calm, take deep breaths, and I saw fear in her eyes as I never before.  I stayed with her in the water for some minutes after.  Talked to her, got her to take a few more deep breaths before we did a few exhales underwater.
Something told me inside that it was a close call.

As we got out of the water, two Korean girls giggled on the pool side.  Perhaps it was amusing to see.  I was just glad that I reacted fast enough.  They did not have a clue what I go through everyday.  Only mothers with kids in the spectrum really know that it's never rainbow and cotton candy.  Most days are just poop on walls or in the mouth.  Loud decibels and banging are our norms.  When it's quiet, then probably the fever visiting because the word "rest" is not in her dictionary.  But we get by, we learn to live with Autism, and the best thing is, we found that by accepting Autism into our life, instead of shooing it out of the door and trying the old "not disciplined enough" method of teaching, we became the better part of ourselves.  Yes, we're a lot crazy sometime, bet you wish you want to be on this side of the brain often, because here, others' judgement do not matter.

We were born FREE

Today morning, we went to visit a newborn baby.  Much to our excitement, we found the 2 days old baby in the same room as the mother (other hospital had a different policy, babies would be kept in separate room to give mothers time out).

The superstar.

We were so happy to greet this special girl.  The energy in that room when we came were so positive, so much love, radiating and reminding us once again that we were born FREE.  

Society imposes on us: who we are, who we have to become, who we can love.  When we were born, we only knew of what we are and where we came from.  We are souls experiencing this human body, the little and fragile human anatomy.  We came from LOVE and we only have LOVE to give to others.  

Yet, we grow up only to realise that separation exists and have been very much embedded in society.  The lies and the shackles society created, it breaks my heart to see many souls forgetting where they came from. 

I'm sharing this video below in a hope that you will too, understand someday.  Yes, freedom is a choice and it is yours to choose.

FREEdom, it's your choice!

Patience, is still a Virtue

Bugs Bunny will be pleased.  All organic from seed to fruit. 

Re-using the blue containers.

The happy celeries.

No chemicals required for these babies to grow.  Just singing and lots of love.

Doodles Now

Ok, her drawing seems to get better (it's in colour now!) but those "lined" eyes, they tick me seriously, when is she going to change them???

About Love

When I was young, I stuck a sticker on my mother's dresser that says "I Love You".  That was on valentine's day and my dad thought it was tacky.  He did not want to hug mom or kiss her in front of the kids.  

The sticker was peeled off 6 years ago when I was going through my court separation process.

Yes, I thought, love is really a marketing gimmick for those who think they're in love, got married and later found themselves stuck with a partner they don't even know, let alone really love.

As I raised a child alone, I realised that love could only possibly exists between a parent and a child.  Blood ties are stronger than anything else.  

That's when I know the reason why some men will never marry a woman who has been married before, the same reason why some men can never love another man's child.

This made me question, if some men are so adamant about having their own child, then why some made children, then ran away from their responsibilities?  Or use their work as an excuse to be an absent father?  Or only want the sweetness of raising children but not the gruesome truth about waking up at night and making a bottle?

Then those men who are adamant about having their own children, from their own bloodline, they are:

- very selfish (stubborn is already a trait in them)

- afraid of the responsibility (then how would I ever trust this type of men with their own blood line?)

- having no compassion (won't make a good father even to his own blood line)

- lacking love themselves (there aren't enough love to distribute to existing human, i.e. the child from the other man, so why would there be enough love to give to his own blood line?)

After much soul journey, I finally decided these:

- some love are very much 3 dimensional.  The type of men that are so adamant about having their own blood line continuing are simply the ones that have not awakened to the fact that we all came from the ultimate source of love.  

These men are too wrapped up in the things that can only be seen with the naked eye.  His job, his business, his friends, those will come first because hey, even the love that you talk to him about, cannot be seen, until it is proven once you conceive his child and slave over him.

- the kind of love that you want to have and be, is the one that connects at the soul. Hence the word "soul mate" that has its usage abused for as long as language existed.

This love, is so rare that sometimes, it does not exists in one's current lifetime.  Depending on what you've signed up for before you come to earth, your soul mate (s) can decide whether to contribute to your lessons (say, if the lesson is of acceptance, then he'll probably bring in a set of his own kids instead of just you bringing in yours) or whether to just be a companion (supportive parents/friends).  If you are going to face a tough life, then your soul mate can decide to be your devoted life partner to get you through that lifetime.  

I can go on with the permutation of cases where soul mates are meeting in one lifetime, but the point being is that despite what the masses think on what love is, it has nothing to do with marriage or physical aspects of it.  

In fact, much of it has to do with one's relationship with one's higher self.  That aspect of us, has direct connection to the ultimate Source of love, therefore, we need not be afraid that there's not enough love to go around to other people's children.  As long as we connect ourselves to the Source, we're going to be LOVE ourselves.  

How do we do that?  To love and to feel loved?  We raise our vibration by accessing higher state of consciousness.  It is so much easier to do that now since people are awakening.  People realise that some partnership has to break to make way for higher learning.  

I know some will stay adamant to their 3 dimensional living because their fear of the unknown is greater than their willingness (or ability) to change for that matter.  For a small step of changing one's perception is a big step in raising one's frequency.

Love and light......