The Return of the Lost Son

Quite often, I'd imagine the day when my brother would return.  What it'll be like, whether I'd be happy or sad, indifferent or angry, stand offish or all involved.  

Well, the day did come, in a way, I had an early birthday present.  Family back together again and best of all, now a month later, he's still around, happy and healthy.

It was as if he had been overseas somewhere for the past year and a half.  I thought I had forgotten what he looks like, but when that car that I bought for him signalled the right turn to go into our street, I saw the same old brother that once told me I was ugly, coming back home.

Happy tears and hugs were everywhere, I know it was not me that made him come back, it was his own determination and strength to get out of an abusive relationship that made him leave.  He was never destined for such dark relationship to begin with, as he came from a family that showed him love can evolve, it can never stay cold as how the Asian tradition had it, it can be gooey and warm as how Hallmark portrays it.

Like anyone who came out from being a victim of domestic abusive relationship, he came out damaged and at first, we didn't recognise who he was, but saw glimpses of him from when he was a 12 year old.  That's right, even he somewhat believed he was back as a 12 year old in the family home and that trauma was added on with new trauma that his ex girlfriend created through drugs, manipulation, control and threats.

Someone said to me a long time ago that it's not important how many fans you have, if you don't have one or two or three good mates that knows you back to front, even 1million followers won't make you happy.

Truly proven in his case as he thought the only way to satisfy his ex gf's need to own him, was for him to cut off his digital and real life in its entirety completely altogether and start a new life with her.  As if he was some sort of crim to begin with, which he wasn't, but her jealousy of his comfort zone, got the better of her and in the end, lost him completely.

As an outsider to this emotional criminal unfolding, I first noticed it when the "Single White Female" scenario unfolded right before my eyes.  Meticulous plan of overtaking his digital life into creating her own digital depiction of his digital life was the scariest to watch of all.  Almost to the point of disgust of how a person who claimed to love the partner they're with, would do such a shameless virtual copycat and expected the partner's family and friends not to notice the gradual disappearing of him and appearance of her as him online.

Now it is all over, she is the one feeling "dumped" and fear of being smeared, so threats were launched everywhere.  What a comedy when this is all her own doing.  It reminds me of a child that has her toy taken away and got angry for it because she thought she has been so "good" to everyone around her when all she has done was throwing up on everyone else's plates.

Life lessons that we all have to go through are so creatively made and planned by ourselves before birth, but trust ourselves that we always leave clues for our 3D-ness that is aware, to say "Hmm, this feels like a sign", or "Do I feel good about making this decision?".  

Our feelings are always right.  It wants to help us make the best decision at that time.  Trust it, know that everything will be all right when we listen to our own intuition.

Welcome home, we've missed you so much and love is here for you.

New Life, New Beginning

Perfect moment captured

I often wonder what it would be like to have my own life.
Free from worrying about how I should behave in society just because of my colour, background and status,
Being able to just walk out the door and do an evening walk without being afraid that I'd get mugged or raped on the way home.
Just living and breathing the same air as everyone else and feeling the freedom that comes with being a human, no matter how bias it could be to my own perception as there are still bills and taxes to pay.

After a year of transition, I finally concluded that life is just life, it actually is so personal to one's own perception of it that no one, not even your twin, can ever give advice to you about how your life should be.
I like mine just the way it is now, with my own illusion of freedom which serves me well.

It is, after all, how one perceives it to be, isn't it?

"The Secret Life of Walter Mitty" (2013) Review

I finally saw Ben Stiller's "The Secret Life of Walter Mitty" as per one of the reader's recommendation (*wink*).

"The Secret Life of Walter Mitty" is actually a short story written by James Thurber and was first appeared in The New Yorker in 1939.
A movie with the same name was made in 1947 with a plot line that was current for that time.
The 2013 movie was in the burner from 1994 with Jim Carrey in mind and somehow ended up with Ben Stiller cast in the lead and also directing.

It is one of those feel good movie for the zombies of this generation (i.e. 9am-8pm work time, no after hours bonus, go home, sleep, wake up, rinse and repeat generation) with breathtaking views of Stykkishólmur, a village on the Snæfellsnes peninsula in Iceland, Höfn, a village in southeast Iceland, Skogafoss waterfall and in Vatnajökull National Park.
The plot is current and simple as it revolves on the change that Walter Mitty is going through as an employee of Life magazine that is restructuring from print to online digital magazine.  As a negative assets manager, his job will no longer exists along with a bunch of others.

I would think that this movie would appeal to anyone who ever asks "What is their purpose of life".

The motto of Life magazine, inscribed inside the wallet given to Walter

It promises adventure and comedy, with a dash of innocent romance from a boring life of a negative assets manager going through restructuring.
This movie is certainly a graphical representation of what goes through the mind of a Mittyesque person.

With wanting love as the starting point, Walter ended up in places he never imagined before.  How many of us had really done that?  We often just say "NEXT" when the object of our affection presented us with a choice.

What I really love about this movie is the message that it carries.  Perhaps it awakens something in everyone differently.
Maybe the changes isn't going to be so rapid like Walter's but the only thing that's stopping the change from occurring would only be ourselves, as Walter clearly showed in the movie.


 

"The Randomers" Review

For those who did not catch the youtube link, click here to watch "The Randomers".

The advertisement read: "Female, 23, seeking relationship without speaking".

A movie about love, that truly had me put my knitting and crocheting down, because it has no dialogue.  What held it together was the actors amazing pairs of eyes that spoke volumes and a well put together pieces of music that has no connection at all, but only evokes reminiscence of Charlie Chaplin's silent movie or the sound of the distant cry of abandoned animals.

It takes guts to make a romantic story without words.  As Shakespeare puts it in "The Tempest":
     "Hear my soul speak: The very instant that I saw you, did my heart fly to your service."
How does the Graham Jones (director) succeeded in conveying these two lovebirds' love, without proper conversations between them?

For sure, you have to see the movie to know how.  Although, I can tell you this.
Watch for the beautiful ocean scenery around the west coast of Ireland, Connemara National Park, and forests around Galway.

Think about this, if you don't count the meaningless conversations between you and your partner, such as, "Coming back for dinner?", "What time do you expect me to be at your office function?", and the sort, then, you'll know that between the two of you, you pretty much do not saying anything meaningful throughout the day.
Discounting the "I love you"s that became pretty much a drill.

Perhaps this valentine, you can look into your partner's eyes and tell her what you really feel without speaking a word.  If she doesn't get it, try a sonnet?

"The Merchant of Venice"
     "One half of me is yours, the other half yours mine own, I would say; but if mine, then yours, and so all yours."

Are You On Auto Pilot?

Is that a dummy smothering the pilot???

The title perhaps need to be elaborated.  It is no surprise that most of us are on auto pilot for the entire living days we are on earth.

When one is born a Chinese descent, you know that on Lunar New Year's eve, you'll see so many people you don't know, that you call something or rather title (apparently related somehow to you), they'll be eating the food that your mom slaved over for days to prepare, and goes home only to appear again the next day, wearing new shiny traditional Chinese clothes (or red in colour), bringing their entire family (the more kids they have, the bigger headache your mom has) and talk loudly with your parents while their kids receiving red pocket called 'angbao'.
Then your parents would nudge you to say that Chinese lines that you've practiced over and over again, fold your fist together and expects to be given an 'angbao', too.

From then on, every year approaching that Lunar New Year's eve, you'll hear your mom stressing out on how the house should be painted over outside, then inside, then outside, then inside, then new furniture is imperative, then new dining set is a must and the list goes on.
As she gets older and we get more mobile, she'll start telling you to stop sweeping the floor on New Year's day, don't cut your nails or use scissors on New Year's day, don't work on New Year's day, and a bunch of new rules to follow on and on and on.
Then your mom goes through a phase of acquiring new skills, Chinese art of Feng Shui and other Chinese metaphysics topics.  The bunch of rules for New Year, became more exact and calculated.  It becomes a hard line doctrine.  Stars are flown every year and plants move accordingly.  The repainting and redecorating becomes even crazier, because apparently you're a Goat, she's a Snake, and dad just shook his head thinking oh boy what are we arguing about!

This is the auto pilot of a well versed overseas Chinese.  Perhaps some other can tell me their version of auto pilot before Christmas.  Thankfully, I'm not on auto pilot anymore.
In fact tomorrow, I might just start my day by sweeping the floor, washing my hair, and working all day.  Let's see what happens to me this year.

Fly horsey, horsey, doesn't matter if you're a wooden horse, I know you're made of cloud, so, fly.....

2013

2013 is a year of great changes and acceleration of growth.
We go through life limiting ourselves, thinking we cannot hear, therefore we cannot dance.
When we start feeling instead of struggling to hear, we start listening to the whispers of our higher self.
Like the deaf dancers of the thousand handed Guan Yin, we can then start to dance to the daily cues of our lives.